Thursday, April 30, 2009


"Unlike grown-ups, children have little need 
to deceive themselves."
J.W. Goethe

Pip is a little lovebug.  She tells us that she loves us all the time, and not just in response to my husband or me telling her that we love her.  Pip's, "I love yous," are often completely random and unsolicited.  She has also been known to say, "I'm falling in love with you, Mama," and, "Mama, I love you and all of your parts."  

Perhaps it was Pip's sweet nature that made it all the more disturbing when she looked at her sister one day and announced, "I don't love her."  
"Who is it that you don't love?" I asked, hoping that Pip was referring to Taylor Angelique, the doll that Crazybaby was currently eating.
"Crazybaby.  I don't love her."

Now, I realize that this is a perfectly normal sentiment for a three-year-old to have about her very assertive and newly-mobile one-year-old sister, but it's still just a wee bit heartbreaking.  I mean, what mother really wants to hear those words uttered?  Not this one.  

Nevertheless, I kept my cool.  I gave my husband a little, "this is interesting," wink across the table and took Pip onto my lap.  I told her that we could understand why she might feel the way she did.  I came up with a couple of, "It must be frustrating when..." scenarios, and I let her know that we thought she was doing a really good job of being a big sister.  Then I told her that I thought she would grow to love Crazybaby someday.  
"I won't Mama." Pip insisted.  So I left it alone.

I have such high hopes for my daughters' relationship, but I can't impose my expectations on them.  It is their relationship.  It will be what it will be.  My husband and I will guide them and love them and make them each feel special, but in the end it's up to them to create their sisterhood.

I'm glad that Pip was honest about her feelings.  I'm also glad that Crazybaby didn't understand a word she said!  (At least I don't think she understood.)