"I am thankful for laughter,
except when milk comes out of my nose."
Woody Allen
My husband and I decided that we would teach Pip the scientifically correct terminology for her private parts. There would be no 'wee-wees' or 'pee-pees' in our household; we were going to call a spade a spade right from the get-go. For the purpose of this story, though, I'll adopt a Grey's Anatomy term and call it a 'Vajayjay'. (Forgive me.)
One Thursday morning this past winter, the girls and I made our way to 'Mother Goose,' a wonderful local programme where pre-schoolers sing songs, hear stories and eat snacks. It's toddler-heaven, really. On this particular Thursday, Pip seemed unusually enthusiastic about the introduction song in which each child chooses an item of their clothing and we all sing about it: "Pip wore her grey shirt, grey shirt, grey shirt, Pip wore her grey shirt all day long." You get the idea.
We sang about shoes, sweaters, socks and pants, then Mother Goose led us through a host of other happy little songs and, before we knew it, the class was over. As we started to gather our coats, Pip marched up to the instructor and announced, "We forgot to sing about my black pants!" Heaven forbid. The ever-accommodating Mother Goose decided to indulge Pip, so we sang a rousing verse of, "Pip wore her black pants, black pants, black pants," before heading out the door.
During the short ride home we reminisced about the class, and as we walked in the front door of our house Pip shrieked, "Mama, do you know what we forgot? We forgot to sing about my Vajayjay!!!" Talk about gratitude. I was so thankful that Mother Goose and the other goslings hadn't heard this particular song request. Naturally, I had to tell Pip that we don't normally sing about our Vajayjays because they're private, but later I caught myself thinking that perhaps we'd all be a little bit better off if we did!